When you are capable of thought and critical judgement as an adult, you can truly see how hopeless you were as a child and how illogical you were as a teenager. And the latter is the worst of the three.
For you see, a child will have wild fantasies, yet ironically, those childish fantasies are more likely to manifest than those of a teenager’s. A child will somehow, through uninhibited energy act out and express their desires, and this can come sometimes bring about what they want. A teenager however, will have wild expectation in mind, in his brain his idealism produces a reality he seeks, yet he cannot find. For you see he will sit angrily waiting for the materialization of these ideals that he holds so dearly. And after realizing that things in life, do not proceed with his preconceived plans and events, he sulks, and lies in the darkness within the miasma of his solitude. This is even more so for those things that he does little to accomplish, and with this he comes to realize the painful truth of success, that you gotta work goddamn hard to obtain it. Things don’t just come to you, you have to chase your dreams, because they do not need to chase you.
This is not to say that I didn’t work hard as a teenager, I worked pretty hard, in fact I did work goddamn hard, I wrote a novel at 17 all within the space of a month. I even sent it to literary agents. However even though I worked “goddamn hard” to reach such a feat, I hadn’t realized that certain skills take time to bloom, and I didn’t know that working “goddamn hard” was a continuous endeavor that should run through out the life of any successful human being. Working “goddamn hard” is a 24/7 thing, that will mess up your mind, but also free you at the same time. When you realize and act upon it, you no longer walk upon the staircase of illusions, you have fallen off of it, and the pain of the fall awakens you, you become lucid. You begin to build a staircase of your own. Hopefully this is a staircase to heaven, but building it, is very painful.